The King of Coke

Pablo Escobar is a Seagull!

DP91 this morning announced the arrival of Pablo 'The King of Coke' Escobar for a fee of just £46,000, an extraordinarily low fee for a man believed to be worth some $30,000,000,000bn an amount that dwarves the £30,000,000m budget believed to be available to sides within The LPF. In fact it is rumoured that Pablo is making some $420,000,000m every week.

Rumours are circling that Pablo has been a long term fan of Brighton & Hove Albion & has actually used the signing of himself to BHAFC as a front in which he will now actually start to launder his cash through the club & in turn pay the club handsomely for the privilege. 

Of course, this is now leading to wide debate amongst the media, of Mr Tony Bloom, The LPF President & his control or intentions for the LPF which has been created with the premise of being exactly a 'Level Playing Field' yet now it appears the team he ironically is chairman & owner of within the format is harbouring & abetting a rumoured drug lord.

Contrary to this report, other reports this morning have called for calm as they believe that the 'King of Coke' himself actually died in 1993, however we firmly believe that a man of such worth is likely to have paid for a simple body double to take the hit & allow the kingpin, Mr Escobar himself, to simply continue to live his life with the general consensus being that he was killed on a rooftop in Medellin, Columbia. 

The rumoured Pablo Escobar other media sources are reporting to have signed can be found pictured below however whether or not they are correct in their assumptions, we will only find out in the near future if BHAFC find themselves plush with cash whilst the remainder of the contingent within The LPF spend considerably lower fees on attracting talent to their clubs.

If there is one thing that is not however up for debate about Pablo Escobar, it is that there will be far more running lines in Brighton with the arrival of the rumoured winger.